I started to reach down and help but she pushed my hand back. “I’ll take care of everything.”“I feel useless.”“You feel like a patient.”“A charity patient.”She froze. “What do you mean?”I took a deep breath. “I just don’t want you doing this to make an impression on Lavi or anything.”“If you think I don’t want to fuck you, you are wrong. I like you, Robert.”“Like me?”She laughed, “Yes, I like you. You’re my friend, I like you, sexually. I missed you.” She sat on my lap.“I...”She looked at me sideways. “What?”“I guess I’m just surprised. I’ve thought of everyone as Melissa’s and Lavi’s friends.”“And you’re what, just a plus one or something?”“Yeah, I guess.”She kissed my nose. “You do know that Zahra and Grace like you too. I mean, not like this,” she reached down and stroked me, “but they like you.”I didn’t know what to say so I changed the topic to something even more embarrassing. I felt myself semi-hard in her hand. “Sorry I’m a bit ... uh, it’s not you, it’s me.”“It’s fine.. I reached over to get mine and gulped some down. "You don't have to do a thing," she said, head tilted and an eyebrow arched. "We don't force girls into joining. It's not like a sorority, I figured you were a sorority girl." I was a Tri-Delt in college," I admitted. An officer. And I remembered how much I had enjoyed sleeping in the dorm with the other girls. Sometimes listening to one of my sisters touch herself. Then touching myself as I heard my sister's soft coos made me hot. Often I wasn't alone in that, and that was even hotter. And the whole time no one said a thing. We went out with boys, we kissed them, and I had kissed them too. But I'd never met a guy who moved me. I sat silently. Thinking, not looking at her, no I did, but looking nervous, Feeling nervous. Was I that way? It was a scary way to be. "I don't know," I finally admitted, looking up, placing my eyes on her hers. "I might be a... lesbian too." "Only one sure way to find out," she said, reaching out.
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